Nearly everyone knows a “high conflict” couple going through divorce or separation, in which one of the parents is manipulating the children into choosing loyalties between that parent and the “other” parent and sometimes the other parents family members too.
But what most people don’t know is that it’s a particularly damaging form of child abuse known as Parental Alienation.
Some of the manipulative or alienating behaviors include:
• Painting themselves as “all good” and the other parent as “all bad”
• Badmouthing the other parent to the child, or in front of the child
• Exaggerating minor flaws in the other parent and suggesting they are unsafe or dangerous. (
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• Inappropriately confiding adult information with the child such as court proceedings
• Asking the child to spy while with the other parent in order to report back.
• Giving the child parental decision-making authority on whether to spend time with the other parent
And the list goes on...
April 25 was designated Parental Alienation Awareness Day to raise awareness of this issue because with awareness we can educate to create understanding and through understanding legislative changes can be made to create environments to reduce the conflict which creates this behaviour.
One of the first changes must be to the Divorce Act to make equal shared parentinga rebuttable presumption for fit parents.
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Family courts in 91ԭ are starting to recognize the seriousness of the manipulation of young children and are reversing custody as a result.
Whileequal shared parenting won’t endParental Alienation, it’s a big step in the right direction.
Children’s best interests are served by having both parents actively involved while parental rights are satisfied by allowing fit parents to raise their children.
Let’s put kids first.
Paulette MacDonald, Child and Family Advocate, Minden Hills, ON
Camp is an experience the lasts a lifetime that many kids don’t have access to.
With your support, the 91ԭ Star Fresh Air Fund provides opportunities for financially vulnerable children to ignite a lifelong love for adventure at camp. Above all, your kindness makes it happen.
